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Tuesday, January 20th, 2009
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Sometimes music will wash over you like the ebb and flow of waves in the deep ocean.
But, sometimes, it will leave you standing on the shore with eyes wide open, gawking at power and unleashed force of the crashing waves in front of you.
To many the The Fantomas would embody this latter personality of the sea.
but somehow, before long you may very well end up finding yourself bobbing up and down* in that ocean, despite the fact a few moments ago you were but brave enough to test the temperature with your toes.
( * )
PS: Big Day Out was fantastic! No energy for full day review, but perhaps a brief summary in ( dot-points >>> )
blah blah blah, that's all for now. I'm glad I got those bits down though, lest I forget.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, January 17th, 2009
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Here i lay, on a bumpy but none-the-less a much appreciated futon mattress, in a house i'm visiting for the first time, the occupants of which i've met one and a half times.
Soft cotton sheets that smell like sunshine. you know that smell. mmm
and the fitted one is royal blue. the single sheet i'm under, is canary yellow and all the vibrancy even in these simple things makes my heart light.
I've felt pretty damn good lately, small things ineveryday life brining me much joy once again, leads me to want to partake in it more enthusiastically and readily, thus leading to more joy! It's a sweet forumla. Vital ingredients were missing for at least a year or so.
This is a pleasant place to sleep. Directly infront of fly screen doors, in a low rise apartment building on the Gold Coast, have fresh breezes wafting through and the oceans steady inhalation and exhalation are audible, but occasionally overwhelmed by the roudy noise from youth being youthful partying in Surfers Paradise.
Despite the bounty of fun tomorrow offers to be i don't have the same adrenaline running through my veins that usually is coarsing through at t minus 12 hours before a big festival. More a chilled out content outlook which I'm happy with too, just different.
The Big Day Out, probably the biggest festival australia has to offer is on toooday ::: "time table"
yipeee
I purchased a ticket this year, without really knowing what or who i wanted to see, apart from a couple of the headliners (neil young, fantomas, prodigy). Without even knowing who most of the names on the bill were at all.
$140 is a fair chunk of money to me at the moment, but so much do i love the Australian sweaty summer festival vibe i'm willing to pay it despite my cluelessness at a lot of the performers appearing, when the only real guarentee i have is the promise of being bumper-to-bumper with the sweaty adrenaline filled mass of bodies mulling around the grounds.
Yeeah, that's worth a hudnred and forty dollars in my eyes alone.
like amoeba hanging out in a petrie dish, moving, interacting, evolving, creating, playing. yeww :D
gonna put the laptop away now, not long before I have to be awake
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, September 12th, 2008
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I wish to speak more eloquently, with more passion and conviction behind my words.
Even my writing has been lack luster & mundane.
When I started scrawling words again, after a two year hiatus (?!) I assumed my skill acquired in those years past would be awaiting me on the other side of that initial bump I'd been stuck in front of for so long. The one which just required bravery enough to put pen to paper to get over, but that hasn't been the case.
Neglected fires burn out. I was at hoping for warm embers but instead have been confronted with cool ashes.
Turns out it's going to be harder than I thought. Regular maintenance is required. Methodical, serial, metronomic attention i have trouble with.
So to combat that, I've set myself a goal to write something at least once, preferably twice a day. Just after rising and just before bed. I've been doing that since July, and I stick to my goal approx 50% of the time. Even when I don't feel at all compelled, the aim being to build up that rhythm & familiarity but it's not there, or I've forgotten the tune.
It's crushing. I don't believe I lack the skill, but no longer can I take the easy route of blaming sheer laziness for my stagnation. Now I have to face up to the fact I'm just no good. Hehe, ACK. When I was younger I would not stick with an activity I didn't have a natural knack for straight away, but luckily most things I wished to pursue came easy.
I suppose there is that chance I was never fantastic at all and it was just my arrogance which helped fuel me, which is another thing I've lost in recent years. But I thought that was a good thing ! Damn. Maybe I need to work on being just a *little bit* arrogant, reacquiring some of that dismantled ego ?
The 'hippy' in me thinks that can't be correct. Ego = bad!
Right?
I guess I'll need to find a cleaner fuel than pride to nourish that aforementioned fire. I'm happy to at least be scurrying about the woods again looking for the right one instead of wallowing about poking those aforementioned ashes. ;)
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Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008
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entertaining the possibility of a journey interstate.
melbourne melbourne melbourne, i think is the location of choice. i rarely hear aught but words of praise come out of the mouthes of those who have been down to the rainy yet colourful city 2 states south of brisbane.
cram a backpack full of clothes, a book or two for the journey, and other bare essentials. jump on my motorbike, who i've just recently been reunited with after a slip and fall (my first one at a speed of more than 0kms an hour, but a rather unexciting one) she feels a little funny with the new replacement handle bars but i'm sure a 1400 km journey would quickly reacquaint me with my beloved Vin
my feet are itchy, i've spent a lot of time giving and giving and giving , so much time, so much love, so much will and energy . and have been Transformed ... into a willing doormat. which leaves me as no use the the party i was trying to help, nor myself.
but no more.
travel soon is a must i think. reabsorb some goodness through the soles of my feet, recharge with eyes on the horizon, face the quantum superposition yeayeah
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Wednesday, October 24th, 2007
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| Time: | 10:44 pm. |
| Mood: | flummoxed. | | Music: | aphex twin - nannou. |
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i am alive... i have a pulse. just in case you wanted to know.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, February 11th, 2007
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i don't have much of anything to say
i'm just trying to get into the habit of writing words frequently again
so in conclusion, as mnay great minds before me have said;
bacon.
ahh yes, give me meaning now plz?
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Comments: Read 11 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, February 5th, 2007
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I had rather strange dreams last night.
Involving little sewer children, the kind you'd expect in movies like Oliver Twist, with soot over their hands and faces, frolicking around in the war-torn streets of England. Whenever they'd start skipping somewhere, theme music would follow and stop just as quickly when they stood still to tip their grubby hats and wink their street-wise winks in your direction.
Very post-apocalyptic in feel.
Also I remember in great detail this crazy elevator that wouldn't do what you wanted; would shoot kilometers below ground when told to go up, and then astronomically high when instructed to do the opposite. Now that wouldn't have been so bad, but this elevator wasn't in any way stable; i think a good description would be to compare it to standing inside of a spinning top, with only one point of the top surface you could stand in to stay centered and balanced, but reaching that exact position was almost impossible to achieve. A buckling of the knees, even an exhalation of breath would cause the whole contraption to lose balance and leave you spinning around, rocking to and fro, for a seemingly endless and torturous moment in time.
All the while being stuck at some stupidly high level above ground, with the doors wide open, revealing only a teeny-tiny ledge between you the looming city scape below.
I think somewhere along this tiny ledge there were people having dinner parties on this tiny ledge, but they were along another side of this building.
Anyhow.. I managed to gather some patience after many failed maneuvers, and most painstakingly and ever - so - slowly crawled towards the controls of the elevator to attempt realign myself at a height that didn't make one nauseous. However, to my dismay all I find where the controls should be is a few useless words of instruction scrawled on a little post-it note where the buttons for different levels should be.
I don't recall how I got out of that situation but the next thing I remember happening was swimming/wading/walking across the Brisbane river, trying to escape some dire situation, perhaps a flood. And stepping out of the grey sludge that is the water turning up my head and facing a sky just as malevolent in colour. Oh, and there were 3 pompous rich people having a picnic or tea party with their pet cats, a dog and many brightly coloured stuffed animals as the water level rose ?
Sounds like it should have been quite scary and nightmare-ish, but it wasn't. It was like a surreal-dream landscape has started to be developed but before it was done it had collided with a dark gritty-reality.
Hmm.
Happily discovered a few days ago I can sort of draw kind of fun cartoon scrawly thingies. Nothing detailed just simple lines and shapes and shadings. But hey, that's cool considering I didn't even expect that much of myself. I think I shall try and pursue this new creative outlet to convey stuff from my sleep to paper.
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Wednesday, June 22nd, 2005
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| Time: | 4:09 pm. |
| Mood: | one or two sugars?. | | Music: | transformers theme song in my head. |
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hello journal. much has changed!
i'm at work at the moment (yes, work, i told you things are different.)
(but the fact i'm slacking off and am sitting on the internet during working hours shows that maybe some do indeed stay the same.)) tee hee
windows has crashed.
i am the blue screen of death.
no one hears your screams.
i'm considering using this thing again. just maybe.
*throws love*
how be you?
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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watchtheweather's journal
dorky.
frustrated.